IKEA Almost Wins

On the way back from visiting Mom in Iowa, Yessa and I made a trip to IKEA in Chicago to pick up some furniture for the new house.

Shopping rips the heart and energy right out of me, and IKEA can accomplish that almost more quickly than anywhere else.

This time, I had a plan. I had a spreadsheet of all the items we wanted to get. They were listed in order of appearance in the store so we would’t have to backtrack. We planned to arrive right as the store opened. We pre-ordered anything we were able to so that at least some of the shopping could be done for us.

And as Mike Tyson said, “Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth.”

We left Mom’s bright and early…in the middle of a snowstorm. I would gladly have put off the drive for a day, but I had an appointment to get home for, plus we had an upcoming trip to Vermont. Time was tight!! The drive took about an hour longer due to the weather, but we still got to IKEA as early as we could.

We followed our spreadsheet layout perfectly, except for a backtrack or two. We loaded up three carts with the items we hadn’t been able to pre-order.

Bless our cashier, she noticed that of the 3 boxes needed for building Yessa’s bed, two were for a full-size bed, one was for a queen-size bed.

Back Yessa went to swap out the boxes.

Then we pushed the 3 carts out to the van and loaded those up.

In I went to get the cart of pre-ordered items.

We neglected to take a picture, but you should know this is when magical thinking had to kick in. The cart of pre-ordered items. was huge. As in, as tall as me and 6 feet long huge.

We started loading up this next round of items.

IKEA employee stops by and offers to help.

We decline.

We realize we are going to have to repack the van to get everything to fit.

Yessa tells me I have to stop saying there is no way everything is going to fit and start being more positive.

Everything still does not fit and we unpack and repack the van again.

Random stranger comes out to offer us sympathy, support, and help unpacking.

We decline, but now have the added knowledge that people are watching us so we are determined to get this done.

We repack the last time, deciding that Buster’s ottoman is not going to be making the drive with us.

We go inside to return the ottoman and as we’re waiting in the line I realize there was a cover that came with the ottoman somewhere in the bowels of the van.

The customer service person asks gently if it is possible for me to get the cover and I tell her emphatically that there is not.

She looks into my crazed eyes and tells me cheerfully that we have a year to return it, unopened.

Without Yessa’s relentless positivity, strong muscles, and sense of humor, this would not have happened.

As of yesterday, March 21, all the IKEA items have been put together and are being enjoyed in the various parts of the house.

Thank God the bookcases we wanted were out of stock because I’m not sure what else would have been left behind.

Can’t wait to buy the bookshelves on our way back from Iowa next time.