Lessons of Sorrow

As Yessa and I were snuggling at bedtime tonight, she had some thoughts she needed to share.

As background, of all the children, Yessa has the greatest need for multiple friends, and here in our new home, she is the one for whom the most new friends have been discovered. Each of the last three nights, our next door neighbor, who is slightly older than Yessa, has come over to play, frolic, eat s’mores, and laugh with us. I think this will be a regular occurrence, which is great. We also have several other good friends close in age to Yessa that she sees regularly.

I say this because I would have suspected Yessa to have had the easiest transition of all of us.

Ahh, the lessons our children teach us.

“Mom, when we found out we were moving to Tennessee, I was excited. I knew that Cousin M would be with us, and that made me feel better. But now that we are here, even though we love it here, and we’re having fun, I miss my friends from Virginia so much. Like Kate and Betty, I just miss them.”

It’s been over 6 months. We are all happy, but it hadn’t occurred to me that talking with the children about their feelings about the move, even now, would be a good idea. Moving creates a form of grief. Everyone grieves on her own schedule.

Luckily, we’ll be seeing Bets and Kate soon. That will bring joy and excitement…and some bittersweet sorrow at the end.

Better to feel the love and grow the heart. Another parenting lesson the children have taught me.