Vignettes
A few weeks ago I had the opportunity to go to Atlanta to bring back furniture from our business storage space there. I drove over the moving truck from home, and then hired two men to spend the day with me, hauling furniture to employee homes, then loading up everything else that had to come back over to The ‘Ville.
Donald and Angel were kind enough to spend the day with me, and it was fantastic. They were both in their twenties. Donald, unmarried with no children. Angel, married with three young children.
Buds gave me a call during the day, and after talking and laughing with him, I hung up, and since the three of us were crammed in the cab of a truck, and they had easily heard both sides of the conversation, I looked at them archly and said, “That was my boyfriend. Don’t tell my husband. No, I’m just kidding. That was my husband.”
Donald asked how long we’d been married, and if we had a good marriage. (Donald was the male version of me…let’s share our life stories after knowing each other 30 minutes.) I told him a bit of our relationship story, and how much I love and respect Buds. He then shared his desire to find someone to share his life with. “You guys make it look so easy, finding a soulmate,” he said to Angel and me.
Later, Angel was talking about his family’s desire to buy a house. Here’s what he said:
“We’d like to get some more space. We live with our three kids, plus my mom and dad, and my sister and her husband. It is a three-bedroom apartment, but more space would be nice.”
Talk about perspective from both these men.
Then, this week while the kids and I were out and about, I had the chance to visit with a woman who was celebrating her 68th wedding anniversary. Her eldest daughter is 62, her youngest is 47. She said she told her eldest daughter to stop telling people her age because it tells them too much about her mom’s age. She was a sprightly delight. I hope I get at least that many years with Buds.
On the topic of marriage and years, a man I worked with years ago just posted his wedding pictures with his partner on FB last week. They’d been together a long time, and were finally able to marry. I was so glad for him, but it brought back memories of our time at a Catholic University together. He was my boss, and his boss called me into her office one day. I don’t remember what we were visiting about, but she asked me if he was gay. I told her I didn’t know, and I didn’t. She said if he was, she couldn’t know because he could be fired.
Yup, folks, that was the classy Catholic University where I was working…
I was so happy to see his pictures and how happy he looked, and so sad to think of all those years he couldn’t be himself, honestly and lovingly. He was a fantastic boss, and a fantastic guy, and one of the few highlights from a soul-sucking place. I’m so grateful the world is evolving.
And speaking of college…a friend from college has started hospice care. She’s my age, in the final stages of cancer, with a daughter younger than Monkey. She’s been so much in my thoughts this week. I’m so grateful to have had her as a part of my college experience. She’s an amazing, inspiring woman. Life is so incredibly precious.
And those words sound so hollow when I know that in these final months…truly her final months…she’s waking up each day so grateful to see another morning. I’m going to try to keep that lesson close to my heart.
